Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone: 

"Is he the right man for the job-just "paws" and think about it?"

(1934-)

In following in the suave footsteps of the old chess master, Angelo Sodano, who for nearly 15 years was the Vatican Secretary of State, the new man from Genoa (a non diplomat) might feel he's in the wrong job and in the wrong place.

In fact the last non diplomatic holder of the position was the controversial French Masonic P2 Cardinal, Jean Villot. He arrived in 1969 and died soon after the controversy of the mysterious death of John Paul I. (See our article on the year of three Popes 1978.) And Cardinal Bertone is just that: a novice envoy in the cloudy waters of modern diplomacy.

So naturally a new Pope requires his own man in the number two position. Nothing wrong with that. And with the Vatican having over 160+ diplomatic relations with other Countries (that we know of), I would suggest that some working diplomatic expertise and skills might just be needed. Now we at this ministry have no interest in men's careers, either in politics or religion. We just want them to be saved. To be Born Again (John 3:3-7.)

But according to some early news accounts, Tarcisio Bertone has sadly none of these important abilities. It seems he doesn't speak English; and isn't that always a premium asset as the diplomatic language of the modern world. Also the previous "Mr. Fix it" skills of his predecessor might leave the new man looking rather like Don Quixote charging windmills.

So who is he and how did he land the number two slot in the Vatican.

Well, it seems he was an old clerical buddy of Joseph Ratzinger going back to when they both worked and patrolled the dark corridors of the Doctrinal Congregation in Rome. (You may remember it however under its old pet name as the dreaded "Holy Office," that spawned the terrible Spanish Inquisition.)

As the previous Cardinal of the Gerona diocese he would frequently be wheeled out to put forwards the Vatican's current views on controversial issues such as cloning. Of this he said: "The church is opposed to cloning...but might change its attitude if Sophia Loren could be cloned," and there speaks a red blooded heterosexual Italian man it seems!

On Islam: "The Pontiff esteems Muslims because they adore the only God." Never mind that they openly reject Christ as the Son of God. Delegating Him to the role of minor prophet! And a non-Saviour of the World!

On the I.M.F lending to poor countries, "it should be declared illegal." Now Bono I know would support that current idea-no not the dog food of the same name, although I have heard of cats acquiring a lasting taste for its meaty flavour, no Bono the Irish singer. You know him with the shades from U2.

On the Da Vinci Code: "It [the novel] tries to discredit the church. The feminine element is present in all the Gospels." Now what does he mean by that? Sounds like closet feminism to me.

And naturally he defends Opus Dei. Sadly ignoring its blossoming world power and wealth.

However his greatest love it seems, is being a part time soccer correspondent both on radio and T.V. Now I wonder, which team he supports perhaps...the Vatican wanderers? But seriously friends, there will be no football in Hell or any other sport!

But maybe like his new boss he's a closet-cat lover. And I wonder, which breeds his favourite: Siamese or Persian. Incidentally the pope it seems has a way of charming feline cats with reports from a member of his family that in visits to cemeteries (?) a dozen or so mogggies would follow him out the gate listening to his every word! Once the Swiss Guards also noticed stray cats following the Pope into St. Peters Sq, very strange if you ask me.

So maybe the new man's diplomatic skills are nil but if he knows the nutritional value of a "Whiskas" meal or a "Felix" snack. Then just "paws" and think about it, maybe just maybe he might just scrape by in his new job by a "cats whisker." As long as he doesn't rub his political opponents fur up the wrong way...ouch!

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P.S. But on a more serious note, Secretary of States come and go, including popes.

But remember the words of the Lord in Matthew 24:35:

All world diplomats need to pause and consider these important timeless words...I suggest now!

G. Patrick Battell, February 2007

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